If not, it’s time to pay attention to your gut feelings.Deep down, you know whether or not he’s right — or wrong — for you.A productive fight is about understanding the other person, finding common ground, compromising, and respecting each other throughout the process.If you end a fight feeling like you’ve won, you’re doing it wrong.You’re not sure where you stand with him and he avoids discussing any future with you.Your relationship is unsatisfying for many reasons but primarily because you’re putting more effort into it than you are enjoying being with him. I thought he was the perfect guy for me, a man who would be sensitive to my needs and feelings.As anyone living in the age of depressing divorce rates knows, a happy long-term couple is almost like a unicorn: If by some miracle you encounter it, you can't stop staring, and you have a feeling no one will ever believe you when you tell them you saw it. At some point a corner of your brain dares register the thought: Could this be one of those? To help you answer that question, you lucky thing, here's a completely unscientific list of 31 ways to know you're in the right relationship: 1. If you're afraid of commitment, best to work that out before you put yourself in a situation where it's hoped you'll eventually commit. Hide anything more significant than a surprise party from each other. Going through your significant other's email, phone, Facebook account, or journal strongly indicates that you don't trust the person you're with. If you're unwilling to introduce the person you're dating at appropriate junctures to the most important people in your life, that's usually a bright, flapping red flag. If you feel that your significant other is your inferior in any way you know matters to you in a mate -- morally, intellectually, socially, financially or professionally -- you're never going to respect him or her as much as you hope to be respected. Professional jealousy can be as poisonous to a relationship as constantly thinking he or she is flirting with your best friend. The same things you're not supposed to talk about on a blind date -- religion, money, politics, kids -- are things you should discuss with someone you're serious about. The Internet is filled with articles on how to decide when to end it, how to recognize when your relationship is toxic, codependent, one-sided, stagnant, asexual, manipulative. That includes exes, cheating, debt, STDs, chronic illness, felonies, whether you want a marriage and/or children, genetic abnormalities (if you both want kids), a strong desire to live somewhere else, professional failures and successes, doubts about your sexual orientation, a strong preference for un-vanilla sex. In general, if you have a good thing going, you can't wait for him or her to meet your friends, siblings, parents, the guy at the deli, and you wouldn't have any qualms about presenting this person to professional acquaintances, people you knew in college, family friends, even your ex. The best relationships make you feel that you've convinced a person more exceptional than you to love you. It also suggests that you're spending a lot of time comparing yourself to a person you supposedly adore, rather than sitting back and marveling at how amazing he or she is. When something the other person does annoys you or turns you off, you don't push it to the back of your mind and hope it will go away, because it won't. A good relationship is galvanizing, not in the oh-my-god-I-met-this-amazing-person-I'd-better-hurry-up-and-fix-myself sense (thought there's probably a little of that when you first start seeing anyone amazing) but in the way that knowing someone else believes in you makes you believe in yourself that much more. You know you can't hide your flaws for long, so you don't try.
Sometimes you’ve been in one too long to realize it’s not right.
How do we really know if he is the right guy for us? I found myself dating the same type of person three times in a row over two years who was not good for me.
After that experience of dead end relationships, I developed a self-awareness compass to guide me during dating that led me to say I do to my fiancée.
But when you’re in the right relationship, everything is different.
The sun shines brighter, your smiles are bigger, and even doing mundane chores becomes more enjoyable.